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Did I read this right?


Tea

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Wow maybe I need to begin a new philosophical path as mid-life doldrums take their toll as half this forum seems to be on a more inward life journey.  My ex has become a buddhist, but you must keep your mind clear of intoxicants and sex.  I did read some with her the other day and it seems to have some solutions but the way to enlightenment seems extreme.  Can one change their nature completely?? Will I be happier attempting to change my natural state as a pleasure seeker?  Can I actually brainwash myself into any belief that is not completely tangible?  I wish I could blind myself and believe in anything unconditionally; take fiction as fact for the sake of my mental well being. Living life as a mathematical thinker where there is only 1 solution creates confusion and sadness at times.   I feel like I just took a dump of meaningless words on the forums.  Isnt that what philosophy is anyway.  Thinking so deep that you confuse yourself?

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Wow maybe I need to begin a new philosophical path as mid-life doldrums take their toll as half this forum seems to be on a more inward life journey.  My ex has become a buddhist, but you must keep your mind clear of intoxicants and sex.  I did read some with her the other day and it seems to have some solutions but the way to enlightenment seems extreme.  Can one change their nature completely?? Will I be happier attempting to change my natural state as a pleasure seeker?  Can I actually brainwash myself into any belief that is not completely tangible?  I wish I could blind myself and believe in anything unconditionally; take fiction as fact for the sake of my mental well being. Living life as a mathematical thinker where there is only 1 solution creates confusion and sadness at times.   I feel like I just took a dump of meaningless words on the forums.  Isnt that what philosophy is anyway.  Thinking so deep that you confuse yourself?

thinking alot about less and less

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Wow, this thread took a few interesting turns.

 

Back to the original post. The auction of the front row spots was for charity, not profit. Whats the issue? Phil, Jill, and TXR arent profiting from this auction. $79.00 tickets for Phil and Friends is pretty much the norm regardless of venue. If you cant pay that go see him play for free in the bar. Or stream the show for $7.00.

 

Now the line-up for the shows I could go on and on about with complaints...

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Wow, this thread took a few interesting turns.

 

Back to the original post. The auction of the front row spots was for charity, not profit. Whats the issue? Phil, Jill, and TXR arent profiting from this auction.

Incorrect - Read original post. TXR improvement fund - their tactic worked :) I don't begrudge profit - Phil has paid his dues. Shapiro ain't free.

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Wow, this thread took a few interesting turns.

 

Back to the original post. The auction of the front row spots was for charity, not profit. Whats the issue? Phil, Jill, and TXR arent profiting from this auction.

Incorrect - Read original post. TXR improvement fund - their tactic worked :) I don't begrudge profit - Phil has paid his dues. Shapiro ain't free.

 

 

ahh, I admittly didnt read the entire post about the auction. I confused this auction for the one they are doing for the show this Friday. They are doing the same kind of auction of front row spots but that is going to the Unbroken Chain Foundation, which is actually a non-profit. Not that I would ever bid on front row spot anyways, too hard to dance.

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the food you eat today will be shit by tomorrow. the person you make love to today will be a rotting, pussing, stinking corpse any day now.  the love you feel for the world in THIS moment cannot extend past THIS moment.  it is all impermanent.  how can we love something definitively if it is always degrading towards death? cause what we THINK we love in this moment isn't really even what we think it is anymore by the time we think about loving it. 

 

do you LOVE it, or are you attached to it cause you think it is somehow REAL?  is that love a vital part of the story you tell yourself about who and what you are?  because none of your stories are real.  every occurrence or "phenomena" arises spontaneously but completely unknowingly codependently.  we cannot know how our "karma" or these "phenomena" arise, only that they do and that they are dependent upon the unknowable.  so what is there to know? what feeling that we have is not just a "illusion" or a "creation" of our ego that thinks things can be known and real.  

 

so who are we to say we "are" this or that or that we "feel" this or that? it is all just what is happening, it is not you or me, but it also cannot occur without you or me because we ARE IT. you know?

 

try Shantideva's (Santideva)'s "Way of the Bodhisattva".  Go to the source.  With each reinterpretation of a heart teaching can come a lot of obscurations.  Going to such an old text as this that has been authentically preserved and transmitted is a good way to start to learn why there is nothing to learn.  Seriously, the Dali Lama carries a copy of this text in his pocket on the reg.

I recommend it to everyone on this forum.  if you like it, ask me for another.

 

i would like to say at this point that the messages in the music of the Grateful Dead are true transmissions of authentic dharma.  I have been following a code of ethics presented to me by DSO courtesy of the GD since I left the first job I quit for DSO.  shit, that is WHY i left my job, because it was at odds with my new morals and ethics.  now I see that it was just the dharma i was following like a road leading home the whole time.  they did know the way. they brought me home.  and keep doing it over and over and over and over (esp thru DSO!)

 

eyes of the world was actually a text and teaching by a famous buddhist…. exact wording in parts as the song!!! i will find a copy from my homie and post it for ya'll soon…..

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I do believe in eternal love.  I don't believe all incarnations of love felt on Earth reach this level, but my love for my father is not temporal and I believe will exist beyond this life.  My mom feels my dad on a daily basis.  My mother is going to love my father until her last breathe and beyond.  

 

I will read your suggestions and others. I definitely think most of the love we experience here on Earth is temporal.  First, its blooms and then later fades away.  It sad, but all too often love is not real and it does fade away.  

 

Remember, you ain't gonna learn what ya don't want to know.  If love can't be eternal for you because you can't conceptualize such a deep feeling; you will never feel it and it will never exist for you.  I want what my parents had/have but apples tend to stay close to their trees.  I also choose to believe in a life beyond this life.  "I'm going to leave this brokedown palace."

 

Oh ya, I also believe in the great advances of science and that not all is mysterious and that human's have figured some things out.

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i have spent a lot of time reading about quarks and strings and such things and I love you and everyone else, too, buddy! math, music and astronomy (astrology) the PURE holy triangle of science ;)  I also continue to learn for many years to come cause I don't know diddly squat.  Gabe and I are working on making it to Nepal in the next year or two to get our masters/PhDs in Tibetan translation so I can't say I'm not trying to learn as much as possible at the moment.  but I do try to remember and recognize the inherent emptiness of all of this.  it is just the mind.  what is the nature of the mind? 

 

i am lucky that i have firm belief in reincarnation (not in the least thanks to this music) and an understanding that we have all been each others mother, brother, child, father, sister, enemy, friend, lover etc…. so i am struggling to remember this in each situation that presents itself to me. whether it is choosing to not eat meat because that critter was once my mother or child, choosing not to kill that CREEPY spider that lived inside the broken light switch in the bedroom or throw it out in winter or just deciding to say and do nothing at all when I am really fucking pissed or extremely sad and looking for someone to blame.  maybe one day, i won't have these urges so powerfully in the first place. 

 

I have been a raging bitch to/in front of quite a few of you.  with this music, it can get a little personal and a little emotional. at least, it did before I started remembering why I go in the first place….

 

to be kind.  shows are such an AMAZING opportunity for "bodhisattva" action.  It makes me happy that so many of us can have so many different opinions, reasons for showing up, ways of being, etc.  the important thing is that we all show up.  not just at the shows, but here on the forums where we stay connected in all of our dark, bleak times in between shows.  Ducats is one of my favorite posters on here for this reason.  if we don't face challenging people and learn to be grateful to them for teaching us kindness, what is the point of saying we feel "love"?

 

I am really freaking stoked to head out to at least the cali onward portion of the west coast tour this spring, it is about all I think about and I am busy crafting away in preparation (or, at least preparing to prepare to craft away hehe).  i am even working on some magical visiting to what i normally call the dreaded northeast (guess it will be when we get there lmao) for a tour sometime before we head out…. what else is there to DO in this freakin country but go see DSO or work with the days between to make it back? 

 

kiss kiss kiss!

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